My Era Avuncular

 This blog is mostly about my writing and my reaction to various pieces of writing (often in the form of scripts used to create films and TV). But it's also a personal blog, so I thought I'd mark a joyous event.

As of one week ago, my sister gave birth to a baby boy. Thus, I'm Uncle Dan!

There's a weird little asterisk here: I was actually already an uncle. A couple years after my mother died, I met my half-brother, who had been given up for adoption when my mom was young and not in a position to raise a baby. This being the early 70s, open adoptions were not a thing, so she, sadly, never heard anything about him afterward. Then, in 2019, my half-brother reached out to us, and I've gotten to know him, and he was at my sister's wedding. He has four girls, the oldest of whom is going off to college, so I've actually been an uncle since I was 20 or so, but didn't know it until about 5 years ago.

However, while I'm very happy to have developed a relationship with my half-brother, it's a very different relationship than the one I have with my sister that I actually grew up with. We're close - I officiated her wedding earlier this year. And I've been invited (/requested) to come over and help her and my brother-in-law in this early period of taking care of the baby.

While I don't know if I'll ever be a dad (there are some important prerequisites I'd need to achieve before that point, chief amongst them being a partner with which to raise a child) it is a moment that really throws my identity into a sharper relief. I've seen younger cousins born and grown up, and my eldest cousin's daughters are both adults now, so on a certain level I'm aware of the passing of generations, but here I'm really confronted with the idea that this is someone who will look up to me, potentially as a role model and certainly as a representative of an older generation.

I remember being bombarded with think-pieces and not a small amount of resentment toward my Millennial generation during my early adulthood - a hack-writer industry that has moved on to Gen Z and seems primed to go after Gen Alpha, of which I think my nephew will be one of the youngest members (if generations are typically 15-year periods, and Millennials were 81-95, that would put Gen Z as 96-2010, and thus Gen Alpha will be 2011-2024 - I realize Baby Boomers break this by being a 20-year generation from 46-65). It's funny to think that to him, we Millennials will probably only take shape as the middle-aged parental generation, and his shock will be seeing us becoming the old fogeys (in my mind, my high school friends' parents are all still in their 50s because that's usually the last time I saw them, even with the very obvious evidence of my father being in his 70s).

At this stage, my nephew's primary concerns are very simple - being held, getting fed, sleeping, and pooping. I don't know that we'll see much of a change in that during the month I'll be visiting, but I'm still eager to form a connection with him, even if he won't really remember these specific days when he's older.

I dream of all the stories and works of art I want to share with him, but I'm trying not to put the cart before the horse - it'll be like a decade minimum before I can run a game of D&D for him (probably a little longer than that). And I don't know if that will interest him!

I wrote on this blog seven years ago about losing my mother. I know she would be really happy to meet her grandson. But, if a journal can chronicle the depths of sadness and loss, it can equally mark the moments of joy and hope.